I am writing because I am new at your site and almost did not read it this morning. God held me fast to read it and now here I am responding.

I saw this Phillip McGraw on the Oprah show and was fascinated. At that time the book was 'Relationship Rescue'. I will try to explain.

I met my husband one Sunday, he came to my parents' home looking for a blind date he had been set up with (we all know God sent him to me). I married this man the following Saturday night after five get-togethers.

That was over forty years ago. During the forty years we have been very normal people - all kinds of ups and downs, both positive and negative.

Well, like most women married a long time, I listened and began to daydream of romantic times and did some wishful thinking as I watched the Oprah show. Now I was all primed for the book so I bought it. The biggest $21.00 mistake I have made in awhile.

There were all kinds of things suggesting that we, as a couple, were not compatible. The more I read and tested (there were mini tests to check things out), the more it was proven that the two of us don't work together. Oh I took the test.

Finally part way through the book I put it down and begun to think about what I was doing. Here I had this 'God given marriage' and this wonderful man who is truly himself. Flaws and all, I love him, as he does me. Yes, we are two completely different people and don't always agree - what two people truly do? Here we have shared the forty something years together and I was about to allow a man trying to make a living selling books, tell me what was wrong with my marriage. I was going to listen to words on those pages or on my TV instead of my God, who gave me this wonderful man when I needed a partner. Now the book is on the bookshelf as a reminder of how stupid I almost was. But God grabbed me by a thought saying 'don't do this' and hearing that thought I stepped back into my right tract. Praising my Lord for His guidance.

Oh you are so right. People BEWARE, the devil will snare us anyway he can. THANK YOU for writing this message today, as it is a learning one. And thank you for listening to my story. Thank you for being out there. You touch many lives.

And praise God for loving us all, no matter what and for guiding us when we are confused, lifting us and setting us right again.

OUR GOD IS AN AWESOME GOD!!!!

Mary

No book or words of men spoken in this world brings the peace and hope that is found throughout the Bible (God's Word).

Even we Pastors truly only bring the truth forward when we have experienced that truth by the Holy Spirit.

Thank you for warning those who might be easily lead down the wrong path. No more 'Fix It', but God make me whole.

Chris

The topic of this weeks circular was interesting to me, but I did not get the type of insight I was hoping for. I am a born-again Christian, yes, but I feel that the Lord has given me artistic talent that is a part of who I am. Unfortunately, this artistic side is all but buried within because it takes work to make a living at it and I don't feel that I have the skills to motivate myself at it. The result is a feeling of unfulfillment.

When I read this commentary I was hoping to hear a perspective on how God wants us to give Him glory through our own individual personalities and gifts. I do not know anything about this particular author, and no doubt he is not a Christian. However, I would disagree with someone who said God doesn't want us to explore our true self, or that we have to give up who we are individually to be a Christian. I just would have liked to hear more on this topic from the Christian point of view. Maybe I just don't see the connection here with the void of unfulfillment in one's professional life and the void one feels because of sin and the need of salvation.

Eric

I am deeply committed to my (Christian) faith. I believe, with all due respect, that your words are passing over too lightly a legitimate area of need which is addressed by the Gospel. The book may be off-base, but the need itself is met in Christ and attempts to be met by the book you reviewed. People are hurting and are under bondage. Being truly authentic is what will help them.

The word "authentic" truly does describe the freedom brought by the Holy Spirit, and further, being a "self"is essential to that liberation (as opposed to the enemy's wish to absorb and take over that very "self', robbing us of our very essence and life - I see it pretty much as C. S. Lewis does in Screwtape Letters.) Living to please others is the antithesis of living for Christ, which I think should be made clear; I believe with all my heart that freedon in Christ should be contrasted with the folly of living to satisfy cravings, lusts, approval of people in general, and idolizing the self of our fallen nature (or anything that isn't God.)

The selfhood that is good is the new creation in Christ and the daughter or son He has created us to become. This starts occurring when we live in His power, following His ways and not our own (base) ways, using His gifts of love, all virtues from His nature, etc. and pray in His name to use His power. Then we have started becoming what is within us because he put it in us!

This is how I see it.

Fran